CHRISTIES 7S

So I gave a small preamble for Christies last week and since we are working a few weeks late, it’ll be less elaborate as the fresh ones.

 21^st Aug Christies Sevens: At Kenya Rugby Football Union Grounds. Also known as Kenya Harlequins grounds or Kenya Rugby Union Grounds. In the end, everyone wants a title to the field but rumour has it that its owned by old-school odieros who will call it whatever you want as long as unalipa rent.. Regardless of the name of the grounds, this is usually a good pace setter for the series with one of the highest conversion rates after safari sevens. Yaani conversion is.... you want to impress a female and you want to watch rugby so you invite her over, coz entrance for her is cheaper than a packet of chips in steers. You marinate her the whole day with alcohol and make her emotionally attached to your useless club as you cheer on and she joins you just to feel a part of something and somehow finds herself back in the fold the very next weekend. That is what is classified as conversion.

The newly renovated club house and guest djays for the Saturday night make the evening worth waiting for instead of hurrying to another venue. Beware of who you step on in the melee as this is the only tournament directors and fans get to share a space trying to watch Supersport on the not so big screen.

Being the first of the tournaments, expectation were high especially after the national sevens team players were released to represent their clubs to get a bit more games before the commonwealth games at the Delhi university on 11^th -12^th October 2010. It was rather disappointing to find half empty (or perhaps half full) stands since we all thought the safaricom stands will be used more than once a year. Thanks MJ and his peoples though, I think those stands would have been of more use if they were to have been put in Russia. IN the words of One loud mouthed fan, they are as usefull as a flower bed during the season.

To the Rugby Newbies: Russia is the concrete stands across from the main stand usually used by Karen Cowboys searching for some tanning.

The Ministry of rugby fanatics were many in attendance and thronged the nondies stand with their happiness and joyful nature whilst harassing some sales guy wearing pumps that can be used to mulika mwizi. Millie was desperately trying to omba the guy for his shoes for “one sato only”.

Special mention is to be given to Bill Githinji who was in attendance. This man has done a lot for Kenyan rugby and has been quickly forgotten. Is it harder to get a team from nothing to quarter finalists? Or from quarter finalists to semi finalists? Food for thought.  When Sidney “Black Rose” Obonyo alongside Paul Odera were losing the Shield finals to Papua New Guinea (perhaps I exaggerate), who stood by their side and made them dragon slayers? Bill Githinji did. And for that, I salute you.

Mwamba demonstrated their might through the strength and skill of the national players. However a general conclusion (mogusu generally)  was that pumping yourself with too many supplements might not be too good for the brain as demonstrated by Horace Owiti’s act of handing Quins an almost hard fought victory. This demonstration of unbelievable stupidity by trying to keep the ball in play instead of practicing patience and let the game slow down, led to a loose ball 10 metres from the line and sealed a victory for Kenya harlequins. Since Mwamba were in the lead, experience was paramount and you’d expect it at least from from a Kenyan 7’s International.

Nondies (the perennial sevens jokers) didn’t play their stars in a show of arrogance/ naivety/ fair play/ development. No one quite understands how one can leave out your star players because the notice came too late for the coaching staff to adapt to the situation. So losing all but two games the entire weekend was all they had to show for their blood, sweat and pain.

A team that is causing a lot of ripples and has put extensive pressure on Nondies is the Rabba brothers’ Homeboys Rugby Football Club. Coming from nothingness one year ago to take the Eric Shirley Shield in their first season and threatening the existence of Nondescripts RFC in the Kenya Cup should earn you some respect. Love them, hate them, you still acknowledge their structure, work ethic and T-shirts. Plus they come with many female fans.

The whole argument of culture and camaraderie between the teams and their leaders is just bar talk. No one cares. You win, you get sponsors, you survive, you get better players and you win more. Who really cares about your traditions? Not the 35 athletically ruthless boys who have moved to a newly formed club. Homeboys gave a steady account of themselves and clearly showed the old folks that they are here to stay by beating Nondies 7-0 in the Bowl semis.

Some small framed speedster shocked the tournament with his speed, agility and playmaking skills. I have only one thing to say to the selections team....EDGAR ABERE for trials. Its time a few of the fantastic seven get a challenge for their shirts. If I, a simple Kenyan fan, can name the National Sevens team that will take the pitch in Delhi, then what research have the SA, NZ and England coaches done already to mitigate this team? Does the team have an inkling of a chance? Ama ina wenyewe?

The rain came and everyone not in the main stand jetted to safcom flowerbed for a few hours. So it was proven, the flower bed can become handy.  Then the night came and the party moved to the club house. All were in attendance, even mvua and baridi. But nothing serious that could not be cured by the tequila selling, flammable polyester wearing cowgirls at ALL rugby events. Who came up with that uniform? It’s freaking awful. They probably get paid extra coz of the harassment they receive for being such criminals in the fashion circles.

Capital mix masters were on the deck and the fans of all teams pretended to like each other so that they can watch the tri-nations rugby on the 36 inch TV through the window. In my case, I needed to stand on a stool since some giant of a man with awfully smelly armpits was standing next to me making me woozy from the stench. Until 11 pm, when the alcohol starts pushing your mind to a point where you can no longer withhold the truth and the impala fans ran to their clubhouse up the road and the quins fans retreated into their clubhouse and leave the outside area for those who have no strong affiliation to either of the teams. And those make the majority, so party iendelee. Plus the kuku and chips keep you warm and energised for the rest of the night.

All in all, fantastic rugby action and Rugby was the winner. (I stole that line from Arigi).

Next week…

Prinsloo sevens: Where to stay, how to get there, what not to drink. And why it’s one of the biggest tourneys in the circuit. For the fan that is.

pictures courtesy of Ministry of Rugby and Myra Maloba